To be filled with the Spirit.
I am spending the morning reading. My favorite past time. I’m soaking in the book of John alongside a great commentary. I am also rereading Spiritual Leadership because in part it haunts my soul. I am usually in a few books at a time so Paradise Lost and Velvet Elvis are also at my feet alongside a couple of Bible studies, as I write. This is not because I am so disciplined but because I love reading in morsels. I love the combination of foods on a plate and I combine cut morsels alongside each other so I can have the perfect bite. I realize I do this with books too.
I’m in this deeply hungry place for more of God. Sort of like when your thirsty and can’t get enough to drink. There are days I can’t get close enough to God, do enough, or pray enough to feel satisfied. I watch my grand daughter try to manage the new art of nourishment, sometimes she drinks more than she can handle and sometime she doesn’t drink enough to satisfy. I can’t get enough right now. Part of me wishes the world really could wait. Appointments could be canceled and schedules cleared. I need more conversation with the “One and Only”. It was dark when I started reading (5 a.m.) and as the sun rises I start grieving that I must soon go and do.
Lately a lot of conversation around me has been about what it means to be a leader or what it means to be filled by the Spirit. I believe God listens to all my ramblings with friends and loved ones and He giggles as he knows I’m about to read something deliciously inspiring in my next time alone. “Through faith, the believers personality is filled, mastered and controlled by the Spirit. The meaning of “filled” is not “to pour into a passive container” but to “take possession of the mind“. Oswald Sanders
“No one whose senses have been excercised to know good or evil can but grieve over the sight of zealous souls seeking to be filled with the Holy Spirit while they are living in a state of moral carelessness and borderline sin. Whoever would be indwelt by the Spirit must judge his life for any hidden iniquities. He must expel from his heart everything that is out of accord with the character of God as revealed by the Holy Scriptures……There can be no tolerance of evil, no laughing off the things that God hates. A.W. Tozer
That is a snippet of the ramblings within my Spirit. Each book highlights a scripture and it adds understanding so that I can bring my Spirit up to breath and drink in all that is being taught. I don’t love for earth today I long for Jesus. I want to sit with him in a garden and have him teach me more about The Kingdom of God. More about His heart and mind. More about the Father and how the Spirit works in my present.
I will not close out my conversation with God as I close my books and Bible. I will continue the asking and the listening as I do my day. But I will secretly wish for more because today I am hungry.